Lithuanian Men in the Forced Soviet Army
An Alien World – “School of Masculinity”
Letters
“I thought the army was something special, but now I can see that it is nothing more than human exploitation. They really take care of us, young people, now, but I don’t like that kind of care. If the ‘old man’ brings me to work, then he gets hell from the lieutenant. The lieutenant gives us hell for listening to the ‘old men’. If you listen to one person, then you get hell from another; if you don’t listen to anyone, then you get hell from them and maybe get punched in the neck too.”
“[…] lieutenant colonel Akmataliyev, the battalion commander, arrived to the company to perform an inspection. Having checked discrepancies and merits, he invited me for a conversation tete-a-tete. He was appalled that in the USSR there were still religious people, he was frustrated that such ‘bandit’ and ‘fascist’, who had not taken the oath, served in his battalion. He swore to shoot my father, mother and relatives for such upbringing, to file charges against the war commissar of Lazdijai for the failure to unveil such discrepancy as well as he promised to inspect Griškevičius and to make sure that he secretly had not helped ‘the fascists’. He led me to his own car and drove me to the headquarters of Kzyl Orda battalion. I realized that the persons, taking high positions, could be so undignified, uneducated and savage… I was thrown into a single cell where, to my great joy, I could pray in peace.”
“Dear parents and Lithuanians,
I prayed till the last moment and could not make up my mind how to behave with regard to an issue of an oath which put me in an anxious state. On 25th of May, 1982 in Janykurgan our group had to take this oath and I was the second in line to do this. I saw the young man, standing in front of me, taking a gun, reading the oath from the book and signing underneath. I did not know what to do and spent this moment in the greatest suffering that I had ever experienced in my life by constantly repeating the words in my heart: ‘Virgin Mary, please guide me towards the way, acceptable to God…’ My turn to take the oath came: so, I took the gun, stood between the soldiers and the captain, who was supposed to receive the oath (would you please understand me, I apologize for the uncertainty that you would feel after reading these lines) and started declaring in Russian: ‘I, a citizen of Lithuania Grigas Robertas, declare that I refuse to take this oath as it contradicts with my religious and patriotic beliefs.’ Everybody condemned me, scolded all my relatives and deported me to Shymkent with an aim to ‘shape me in the right form’ by the authorities of the brigade. There I wrote the application [the copy of this application, which had been kept under the epaulette, is attached to this letter]. They put me into a detention room together with criminals, who tried to ‘shape me into a soviet human being’, for twenty four hours. Today they brought me to Badam from where they are going to bring me together with a new group of Uzbeks to the working battalion, located in Jizzakh. Let it be God’s will with regard to what is going to happen further.”
Photo of Organisation of Afghanistan War Veterans
“Miražas” (“The Mirage”)
“Arūnas was led to the pit and by being kicked in the butt he was thrown into it. The people, under arrest, received their food which had been lowered by a rope. One could not climb out from the pit, there was a guard nearby. When the arrestee needed to go to toilet, he would dig a hole in the dirt as a cat. After the period for the arrest had expired, they would lower a rope for the arrestee and by holding to it, he climbed out the pit. The pit had never been empty, as one can become an arrestee for drinking non-boiled water. The pit got empty only when the regimen parted to perform certain operations.”
Photo of Organisation of Afghanistan War Veterans
“Miražas” (“The Mirage”)
“I recognized Nuriyev straight away. We had previously had a fight in the canteen. Now he was entirely black, sort of burnt. He had scraps of the remaining clothes going all the way down from his elbows and waist. You could see his genitals with burnt hair. You could see his crushed skull and brain leaking from it. His arms, bent at the elbows, were lifted up. Besides our stretchers, there were another three of them in the yard. One soldier with rubber gloves lifted separate chunks of meat and the major identified them as parts of human body and ordered the stretcher to put them in. It was more difficult to determine whose legs belonged to whom. All three legs were right ones and the one from them belonged to a certain military officer.”
Photo of Organisation of Afghanistan War Veterans
“Miražas” (“The Mirage”)
“For the young ones the days are too long while nights are too short. Their day is so tense by getting in the following activities: avoiding getting too tired, outsmarting others and lying. A young person can be and has to be beaten up because there is a rule stating that a soldier starts understanding everything only while being beaten up. They beat you by hitting on the liver, duodenal, kidneys and backbone between the shoulder blades. They avoid hitting on the face because it is not worth it: one might be interrogated due to the bruises or broken teeth.
The army teaches that a human being has numerous painful points all over his body, which are memorized during the service in the army.
An upper button of the uniform is always bent for a young soldier. If it has a normal shape, that is slightly convex, you get punched in a harsh way so that you instantly experience white flashes in your eyes as the button is pressed very hard against your chest while there is an obligation to keep calm while standing. It’s not an obligation to hit somebody. One can order to beat somebody’s head on the edge of the bed, or by using one’s gun as a means for hitting etc. One can go insane by repeatedly paying respect to an electrical switch. Marching up to the switch you pay respect to it and pose a question: ‘Please allow me to turn you off, Comrade Switch!’ After switching off you inquire once again: ‘Would you let me walk away?’ Upon paying respect to the said switch you turn around, then march a couple of steps, then turn around according to the statute and after approaching it once again you ask whether it is possible to turn it on, then you would march further, then you would turn it on and turn it off…
A brick might as well turn into an alleged chief, though you need to ask the brick to be moved.”
Photo of Organisation of Afghanistan War Veterans
“Miražas” (“The Mirage”)
“To tell the truth, the title of a veteran can be cancelled if you become ‘chada’ (the lowest contempt rank of the militaries), because you are unable to boss young people around or to foster them in such a way so that they listen to you and respect you. If you fail to do that you are not worthy of a veteran rank anymore. Thus, your belt is tightly wrapped around your waist again, the embroidery of HB on your uniform is removed and you are destined to join young soldiers till you are able to defend yourself and to assault others by using fists.”
Photo of Organisation of Afghanistan War Veterans
“Miražas” (“The Mirage”)
“As hounds we traced the dotted splashes of blood on the stones and the ground, leading us to the aul. As soon as we got into it, sergeant Usov shot a man and a teenager praying under the trees. We raided houses, hitting locals with the buttstocks of our guns […]. For once, together with sergeant Usov we jumped into the shade of the trees. The women, hiding in the bushes, started to scream out of fear. Usov changed an empty cartridge of bullets into a full one and shouted: ‘I will shoot all those sluts!’ I did not realize how quickly I pointed the barrel of my gun to his abdomen. […] What a pity that it did not fire out and everything ended. I would have taken revenge for all the bullying that he had inflicted on me. He was in the service a year earlier than me, so when I was a beginner, he used to boss me around like a dog only for the reason that I was ‘labus’ (Lithuanian).”
Photo of Organisation of Afghanistan War Veterans
“Miražas” (“The Mirage”)
“A table for ten people. There were a couple of privates, 3-4 veterans and 4-5 young soldiers. The butter was divided into four equal parts – two parts were allocated to the privates, one to the veterans and the smallest part went to the young soldiers. As far as the porridge was concerned, it was copiously given to the privates and the rest of it was allocated to the young soldiers. The porridge, served to the tables, was barely warm and the greasy plates stood for the last test of one’s patience […]. The plates and pots with porridge used to be thrown at the kitchen window, meant for distributing the food, and the young soldiers and ‘chada’ veterans (the lowest contempt rank of the militaries) on duty were being chased and beaten on the spot in the hall.”
“As the time goes by, I remember my home more frequently. I realized that everything was so well until I went to the army. It’s been already a year and a half since I am deprived of having a normal day. Lately, I have totally gone out of control. If I was of a different upbringing, I would beat him on the head… However, if I lash out, he will get even angrier and I will be punished more harshly. I do not know what to do… Forgive me, mother, for such big pain caused to you, but I cannot hide anything from you anymore. I do not know what to do, maybe you could try to go to the military commissariat for recruitment… Mother, I am sure that your prayers would help me! Maybe God would listen to you and a day of happiness would come and there will be an end to all the suffering and hardship.”
“Dear Mother!
It’s already been two weeks since my ‘escape’ and now I am walking around the town. I am running out of 15 rubles that I had, therefore, I have to go to the lieutenant as I would have nothing to eat. Maybe, they are going to arrest me, but I am not afraid of anything as the truth is on my side. How much a person can suffer. […] how can it be that in what is said to be a very perfect system, a person is beaten, taken advantage of because he is weaker, forced to do things that even small children can do for themselves. There is an obvious consequence on my body from such life: the scars at the corners of the lips and a broken tooth. Needless to mention nerves and health are all wracked!”
“The hardship is not that you are physically tired, I can hardly find any words to describe it… Sometimes you do not feel as a human, you are treated as a thing – not in a sence that you are kicked or beaten but you are spoken to as if you were a dog or even worse…“; „In the army a soldier is not important. Actually, he is dependent on others, the chiefs could do whatever it pleased them and you cannot do anything… They say that there is no man without army, but I reckon that I would be a better man without any army, as the army shapes a human into something similar to an animal.”
“Today it’s Sunday for us. Maybe only the fourth Sunday like this during the year. All the rest were only ‘voskresnik, subotnik’ (little Sunday/Saturday)… Whenever we get half an hour free we usually pick lilies of the valley, as some officer wants to give a bouquet of them to his girlfriend or wife“; „I have nothing nice to add and would opt for not revealing anything else to you“.
“They would beat you when they catch you. For what? Who knows, they say, they have to do that”; “I could describe the army as a flock of fools”; “It’s not appropriate to talk and it’s not appropriate to be silent either. At the beginning I used to revolt against it. Now
I am sitting as a mouse under the brush. I wish to return back home not crippled. Accidents happen here quite frequently…”
“4th of January, 1978
Dear loved ones!
That cursed illness is torturing me. […] At night they would wake me up every hour, however, it does not do any good. Old soldiers are mad at me for this, but what can I do? They say that if they beat me up everything would heal up. At the medical office they would shout, the soldiers would be angry, and I feel terribly bad when I cannot sleep in a dry bed.
The army seemed to me as something extraordinary, but now I realized that there is a complete exploitation of people. […] If elder military brings me to work, he is scolded by the lieutenant. The lieutenant would scold us for being obedient to the elder officers. If you listen to somebody, in return, you are scolded by others for obedience, but if you rebel against somebody you get hammered by them or sometimes even beaten up.”
“28th of January 1978
On the whole the things go as usual and I do not know for how long I have to suffer here. It would be better for you and for me if they let me home, as I cannot suffer anymore only because of the illness. The elder militaries are constantly mocking and pushing me around, they always try to make me work. If I returned home, I would definitely find a decent job, a good girlfriend and I would live as a normal human being. I cannot suffer any longer here and for sure, once, without waiting for any longer, I am going to find my place – – – Maybe then there would be peace for me, though the peace would be out of this world, but my mind would be calm and I would not be ordered around as a dog by anybody else.”
“On the 7th of July, around eleven a.m., in the fleet of motor vehicles, Vorchila demanded from privates Straleckas, Sytov, Fasakhov, whom he was in charge of, to get cigarettes for him. When he found out that his request would not be fulfilled, he walked the soldiers to the accumulator premises. He punched Fasakhov on his chest for two times, then he struck Straleckas on his face and for two times he punched him on the chest, and as a result of such violence Straleckas bent in pain, then he kicked Sytov in his chest and arm. Having realized the danger of his actions and being indifferent to the consequences, he punched and kicked Straleckas, who was still bent in pain, in the chest and kicked him on his neck by the heel of his footwear. Straleckas lost his consciousness and fell on the ground […]. As a result of his severe injuries, Straleckas suffered a hemorrhage of blood into the soft tissues, the glands of the neck and the anterior wall of the left ventricle of the heart, which led to his death. A conclusion of an expert-psychiatrist stated that ‘Vorchila was and is mentally sane”.
“It was like this. There were three of us in the house. Late in the evening four soldiers came. Two Kazakhs, one Uzbek and Kyrgyz. They were drunk. They started from the youngster. I wanted to defend him. They jumped on me. […] They started from my feet. When I regained my consciousness, the blood was running from my nose in streams. […] In a split second of the lightning I grabbed my coat and shot through the door as fast as a bullet. […] I went running through the fields. I was walking for a very long time… Finally, I reached my destination. In order not to scare anybody, I knocked. When he opened the door, he startled anyway. When I looked in the mirror, I got startled myself as well. It cannot be that it’s me? It’s strange […] That’s my story. The service is the service. Anyway, now everything is ok!”
“Hello Mommy!
By the first lines of the letter, I wanted to ask about your health and whether you are well and healthy? How are you keeping? Do you have a lot of work to do? What’s the weather like? Here, right now, the weather is not the best, it’s been raining for five days in a row. In the morning, when you wake up, you have to wash the floor straight away. Besides washing the floor, you are circled by three or four seniors who are kicking from all the sides and you do not know what to do and they kick so hard that you fall on the floor and it’s difficult to get up. The same happens during noon and evening, you do not have any moment for having a rest and the sides of your body get relaxed only when you go to bed. I would get through however much suffering has to be endured. I am writing this letter to you at the midnight – at 12 a.m., we have washed the floor already and this time I had not been punched at all. It happened because one Lithuanian soldier, who had already served for one year, stated not to disturb Lithuanians. We do not know what happens next, but this evening my sides got a decent rest…”
„Hello, Daddy!
With the first lines of this letter, I would like to thank you for your letter and at the same time I would like to enquire about your health, the weather and the barley – whether it has already been threshed. Daddy, get ready for bad news: they stole the driver’s license from me, they took it from underneath my pillow at night. I went straight to the office and said that to the captain. He asked to write a report and I did. Then they summoned the soldier who was on duty that night and asked about my driver’s license. He said he did not know anything about it. Then the captain told him to look for the driver’s license and for a failure to find it he would be charged a penalty of 250 rubles and I would have to re-take an examination to obtain this license. I do not know what is going to happen next and I am very upset at the moment for such doom, brought upon me: not only I was beaten but also deprived of my profession to be a driver.
I kiss you all dearly, Vytukas.”
“Mommy, you could not wait and went to the military recruit office for the postal packages, money, reporting that they beat me. I got the information from the report, sent by the same military recruit office. The captain asked me whether I had been beaten or not and I told, that I had been beaten without mentioning the names for the fear that they would kill me. Mommy, do not go to that military recruit office anymore and do not tell them anything about me. Everybody here learned about the said report, sent from the military recruit office.
Vytukas.”